I’ve been coaching people to live holistically for some time.

My focus is living an authentic and embodied life and I’ve studied different modalities to help people do that, including nutrition, movement and more.

Over the years I had been intrigued by the philosophy of Tantra and been exposed to a couple of sexual tantra communities. There was a big one here in Sedona and I went to one workshop, and I was completely turned off. It was very leaky, sexually. It didn’t feel integrous. But…

A seed somewhere within me had been planted.

Despite that experience, I had this little seed growing inside me that wanted to expand my understanding and experience of what true intimacy was. And then, two and a half years ago, I met a woman who said she was an Erotic Blueprints coach.

I, of course, wondered, “What’s that?”

She talked to me about it for like five minutes and said, “Go home and take the quiz.”

bolted home.

I was electrified even though she gave me the briefest description.

I came home, took the test and…

…signed up for the training which was $5,000 at the time (now it’s $12,000).

My partner was horrified that I’d spent that kind of money on something I knew little about.

I didn’t consciously know why it was electrifying or why I signed up. Later, I came to realize that we can’t talk about living holistically without incorporating this HUGE area of our expression.

Erotic blueprints aren’t limited to sexuality.

We come into life as sensual, erotic beings—there’s a pleasure receptor in every cell of our bodies. Babies and small children are all about pleasure, right?

But it’s been conditioned out of us.

How many people prioritize pleasure in their day-to-day lives?

I sometimes ask my clients: “What percentage of your day is dedicated to pleasure?”

They look at me blankly.


Pleasure is somehow equated with sexuality or some luxury we can only allow every now and again, instead of it being an essential part of our life that nourishes us in a deep, deep way.

When we talk about a holistic lifestyle, we think about yoga or Pilates. Or the food we eat. The water we drink. The thoughts we think and…

…ZIP when it comes to expressing our erotic energy.

But erotic energy is life-force energy.

I had a couple who had been married 35 years, and they never talked to each other about sex. I said, “You know, it’s so interesting that a lot of people aren’t talking about sexuality whether they’re in partnership or not. And yet every single one of us is here because of sex!”

Every. Single. One. Of. Us.

We wouldn’t be here otherwise. But, you know, it’s like little, secretive conversations and my god

…sex sells!

We know this.

Marketing relies heavily on sexual expression, right?

There’s such a weird relationship with it. And there’s a lot of healing that needs to happen around sensuality, sexuality, erotic expression.

So when I work with clients, in part, it’s learning how to talk without shame, without feeling like it’s taboo to talk about erotic expression.

I came in at the perfect time.

Jaiya Ma is an award-winning sexologist, best-selling author, and the creator of the Erotic Blueprint Breakthrough™. She’s been featured on Tony Robbins, and has authored 4 books including, Red Hot Touch and Cuffed, Tied and Satisfied. She presently gets close to 700 people at her events.

When I signed up for the coaching program with my partner, I’d been dating him for a couple of months. There was a weekend workshop and I said, “Do you want to go with me?”

He replied, “Yes!”

And I was like, “That’s a good sign!”

We went to LA for the workshop. There were about 200 people.

And it was a mind-blowing event!

It was raw and funny and deep and…


Erotic Blueprints are about self-development.

Erotic Blueprints are another avenue of self development, personal growth and healing. What Jaiya discovered is something like the love languages.

It’s about knowing who we are.

We need to feed ourselves. We need to know how to get fed by sharing, “This is my truth. This is how I receive love,” and then learn how to speak our partner’s love language. It builds compassion and understanding.

If my love language is touch and my partner’s is acts of service and I’m touching him all day long, while he’s doing acts of service, we’re both feeling starved and neither one of us is feeling loved.

It’s the exact same premise.

To discover the five types of the erotic blueprints, watch for part two of this series where I share them, as well as their super powers and shadow side;-)